It’s finally here!! I received the acceptance email for this poem 14 months ago. Yes, 14 months…over a year. And it’s just a little thing but I’ve always loved and been proud of this piece.
Thank you to Bete Noire Magazine for including me in this issue!
Proud to have three of my poems published in my friend Jen Roomes’ kickass zine crapnation!
Got this little poem called “Hush” published today over at Horn & Ivory Zine for their last issue!
Fun story behind it – I wrote it during my recovery from surgery back in January while loving my life on morphine! I have very little memory of actually writing it but I’m proud of it. It’s actually a song still in progress – the poem version of it just got published first.
Thanks to the folks at H&I ❤
He’s playing me
acoustic heartbreak in
the scale of Lies
but it’s my time now. It’s my turn
so hush down and close your eyes.
No, you don’t know this one,
only I know the words to this song.
Hush down now and close your eyes.
I’ll sing us to sleep –
you for a few hours,
A Tylenol lullaby bye baby,
composed of some whiskey and codeine.
A cocktail hymn of shallow breaths and SSRIs.
My narcotic lullaby bye baby,
for your ears and one night only.
Under stainglass stars and porcelain moonlight.
My lethal lullaby bye baby,
my song of goodnight
Another article of mine was published on The Mighty the other day! This one took a lot for me to submit – the thought of people reading it was terrifying, which I took as a sign that I had to do it.
April 17th 2016. A day I won’t forget – can’t forget.
Today marks one year since my last suicide attempt.
On this day in 2016 I swallowed a cocktail of pills, slit wrists. And I was saved by two friends.
Life has changed in so many ways since that day. Some for better, some for not. And some things are exactly the same. It’s crazy thinking back on what I’ve been through in just a year. So much. Too much, at times. I look different now, in a very noticeable way if you know me. Last year I was already fading fast and it’s all taken its toll on me, both physically and emotionally.
Heartbreak and betrayal. Successes and failures. Friends found and lost. Illnesses and surgery. Abandonment.
So many ups and downs.
I’m still just a fragile girl, a scared girl, lost and unsure. Loneliness is still my closest friend, but I’m moving forward in life. I’m making things happen. Things I never would have thought possible on this day last year.
A year ago today I gave up on life. But I’m still here. I wanted it all to end but two amazing people saved me that day, and I found hope. I’m still here.
So excited to be published on TheMighty.com and be an official contributor! It’s obviously very personal to me and, I feel, really important.