Silently (poem)

It’s finally here!! I received the acceptance email for this poem 14 months ago. Yes, 14 months…over a year. And it’s just a little thing but I’ve always loved and been proud of this piece.

Thank you to Bete Noire Magazine for including me in this issue!

 

Advertisements

When Winter Depression Leaves You With No Motivation

New article up on The Mighty a few days ago!

https://themighty.com/2017/11/depression-winter-motivation/

darkblue

Summer Pop-Punk Days | June Gloom + July Sunshine | Hungover Love (poems)

Proud to have three of my poems published in my friend Jen Roomes’ kickass zine crapnation!

21149917_1887293834924932_2656459435045524644_n 21150105_1887293831591599_5670841807469669742_n21167437_1887293828258266_7171630148273444419_o

21078314_1887294011591581_5935655741188022703_n

Hush (poem)

Got this little poem called “Hush” published today over at Horn & Ivory Zine for their last issue!

Fun story behind it – I wrote it during my recovery from surgery back in January while loving my life on morphine! I have very little memory of actually writing it but I’m proud of it. It’s actually a song still in progress – the poem version of it just got published first.

Thanks to the folks at H&I ❤

HUSH
by forrest jamie
He’s playing me
acoustic heartbreak in
the scale of Lies
but it’s my time now. It’s my turn
so hush down and close your eyes.
No, you don’t know this one,
only I know the words to this song.
Hush down now and close your eyes.
I’ll sing us to sleep –
you for a few hours,
me forever.
A Tylenol lullaby bye baby,
composed of some whiskey and codeine.
A cocktail hymn of shallow breaths and SSRIs.
My narcotic lullaby bye baby,
for your ears and one night only.
Under stainglass stars and porcelain moonlight.
My lethal lullaby bye baby,
my song of goodnight
(goodbye.)
hi

One Year (April 17th 2016)

April 17th 2016. A day I won’t forget – can’t forget.

download

Today marks one year since my last suicide attempt.

On this day in 2016 I swallowed a cocktail of pills, slit wrists. And I was saved by two friends.

Life has changed in so many ways since that day. Some for better, some for not. And some things are exactly the same. It’s crazy thinking back on what I’ve been through in just a year. So much. Too much, at times. I look different now, in a very noticeable way if you know me. Last year I was already fading fast and it’s all taken its toll on me, both physically and emotionally.

Heartbreak and betrayal. Successes and failures. Friends found and lost. Illnesses and surgery. Abandonment.

So many ups and downs.

I’m still just a fragile girl, a scared girl, lost and unsure. Loneliness is still my closest friend, but I’m moving forward in life. I’m making things happen. Things I never would have thought possible on this day last year.

Baby steps.

A year ago today I gave up on life. But I’m still here. I wanted it all to end but two amazing people saved me that day, and I found hope. I’m still here.

What Dialectical Behavior Therapy Has Taught Me So Far

So excited to be published on TheMighty.com and be an official contributor! It’s obviously very personal to me and, I feel, really important.

https://themighty.com/2017/03/borderline-personality-disorder-bpd-dialectical-behavior-therapy-dbt/

Nowhere (poem)

nowhere.pngHuge thanks to Katherine and everyone at Understorey Magazine for liking my poem enough to publish it in their Home&Away issue!!

It’s my second paid publication and I still am having a hard time believing that anyone thinks my writing is good enough to publish.A very encouraging way to end a challenging year.

Nowhere

In a town where everyone
knows everyone
the girl who never connected is
an outsider.

School, recess, friends:
I do not belong here.
Family, holidays, gatherings:
I do not belong here.

My own mind, never operating right:
I do not belong here.
My own body, uncomfortable and ugly:
I do not belong here.

How do I get better
survive the day
when every place I go, every choice I make
feels wrong?

In a town where everyone
knows everyone
and everything about each other
I know surprisingly little.

People ask, Are you a small town person or a big city person?
I just assumed I was a big city person
considering the smothering town
I am escaping.

But now the city
is dizzy
and lonely
and swallowing me
whole.

I do not belong here.

14956628_1454872434541325_7419626689500877294_n.png